the baby''s ''erotogenic zone''--oral stage, anal stage, phallic (or genital) stage--What is happening in this process...is a gradual organization of the libidinal drives...
Fixation: If for some reason the individual is frustrated in gratifying these needs during childhood, the adult personality may be warped accordingly (that is, development may be arrested or fixated). For example, adults who are compulsively fastidious may suffer...from an anal fixation traceable to overly strict toilet training during early childhood. compulsive cigarette smoking--oral fixation traceable to premature weaning.
The child is still not gendered.
Oedipus complex--around age five
The child who emerges from the pre-Oedipal stages we have been following is not only anarchic and sadistic but incestuous to boot: the boy''s close involvement with his mother''s body leads him to an unconscious desire for sexual union with her, whereas the girl ...begins to turn her libido towards the father. ...the parent of the same sex will come to figure as a rival in its affections for the parent of the opposite sex.
What persuades the boy-child to abandon his incestuous desire for the mother is the father''s threat of castration. (exemplified in the girl.) [The boy] thus represses his incestuous desire in anxious resignation, adjust himself to the ''reality principle'', submits to the father, detaches himself from the mother, and comforts himself with the unconscious consolation that though he cannot hope to oust his father and possess his mother, his father symbolizes a place which he himself will be able to take up and realize in the future. ...The boy makes peace with his father, identifies with him, and is thus introduced into the symbolic role of manhood. ...His earlier diffuse libido has become organized through the Oedipus complex in a way which centers it upon genital sexuality. If the boy is unable successfully to overcome the Oedipus complex, he may be sexually incapacipated for such as role...homosexuality.